Five years ago at exactly this time, I was figuring out how to get to Manhattan from my closet-sized room in Bed-Stuy to apply for an assistant job for New York Fashion Week. The trains stopped because it was snowing hard, I stopped eating breakfast because I needed time to forget the horrors of the bathroom I shared with six other people in the “artist collective” (i.e.: broke 20-somethings who are a microwave mac-and-cheese away from living in a car) I lived in, and I was surviving almost exclusively on gyro carts and canned soup. My resolutions back in 2010? None what so ever. I was living in the moment and incredibly excited about my life.
Five years later, I’m living less in the moment but I’m still incredibly excited about my life without bothering with resolutions. I’m not sure what it is about a new year that has people feeling like they need to be a better version of themselves. Not that that’s a bad thing, of course, which is why we’ve come up with a list of Instagram fitspo you should follow if you’re planning to get fit, new restaurants you should check out if you want to eat something else other than your regular chicken rice stall, and even fashion investments you should spend money on this year.
While I did list my resolution with the rest of the Sassy team, I’m more of an affirmation kinda girl. And instead of doing it on new year’s, I do it on my birthday, which makes more sense for me.
If you want to make a change at the start of the year however, here are 5 affirmations you could adapt for the year 2015.
#1 Realise that nobody’s opinion is better than your own
It’s hard not to be affected by what other people think. Whether it’s about your clothes, about your makeup, about your body, about how you spend your money, your religious beliefs – or the lack of it. People have opinions on everything, whether or not it concerns them. It’s not about what others think, but it’s about what you think of yourself that matters. Do what’s right for you. Sometimes, it takes more time to figure out what you really want for yourself, but trust your gut.
#2 Let go of the shame of past failures
Sure, you’ve made mistakes in the past. So has everybody. And you’ll continue to make more mistakes in the future, but mistakes shouldn’t define you and your past doesn’t equate your future. Stop berating yourself for what you didn’t do, stop criticising yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and let it go. Make sure you do better tomorrow.
#3 Stop overlooking the good things in your life
It’s easier to sit down and complain about the things you don’t have, or be envious of things other people have that you don’t, instead of appreciating what you have. Start with whipping up a gratitude list, and thank God or The Universe for all the good things you have – whether it’s your sister, a job you love, and enviable wardrobe, the ability to walk, and to be able to go home to a family who loves you no matter what.
#4 It’s OK to let some relationships go
It’s hard to walk away from relationships you’ve built – whether it’s a relationship with your career, a friendship, or a romantic relationship. If the biggest thing holding you back from letting go is the time you’ve put into it, it’s time to pull up your big girl panties and call it quits. People will give you sh*t for it, and people will tell you to hold on and think about how much you’ve put into it. You’re old enough to know what’s best for you and ridding yourself of toxic relationships will do a lot to your mental health.
#5 Be inspirational
Be someone that you can be proud of when you go to bed at night. At the end of the day, that’s all that matters.